Christ
the King Lutheran Church
The Christian Counseling Center
FROM OUR COUNSELOR’S OFFICE ---
“Now” is the
best “present” I’ve ever been given. Although, I haven’t always appreciated it
as I do now. As a small child, I played very well with it. Actually, I
knew nothing else than to constantly play in my present. In middle school
I often found it “boring” and complained that there was nothing to do. I think
that it was then that my present started slipping from my hands. As time
went on, my present almost entirely becoming foreign to me as I got
caught up in all the demands of school, work, and family,
At some point I realized now, was very unpleasant from time to time. I
only appreciated my present when it was good. When it hurt or was too
taxing, I did my best to avoid it in some creative fashion, usually with some
form of entertainment involving friends, food, and work. Friends did the same
thing with their presents, replacing theirs with other unconscious habits
involving computers, TV, drinking, etc... Time flew by.
Gradually, I came upon the brutal realization that my present is a
time-limited gift. One personal tragedy slapped me out of a semi-conscious life.
Death-slap! Several years ago my sister died with her husband in a car accident.
If I could ask God for anything, besides allowing them to live, it would be to
have been able to gather her up in my arms so that she would not die alone on
that winter night. She was a psychiatrist and I, a psychologist. She was my
friend. Life and death, were just a breath apart.
Through my sister’s death, I found my precious present again and I held
onto it with more gratitude than ever. However, tragedies followed relentlessly,
like the pounding waves crashing against a Galveston home, until it was
unrecognizable. My present was so painful. Almost any other place would
be an improvement. But, there was no other place. I looked at the present
in my hand and wanted to throw it out to sea, but something in me knew that if I
did, I would drown with it. This was my life, my cross, my hand of cards, and as
bull-headed as I am, I would rather live than die.
As years have passed and the storms of life have subsided some, now I
realize why I am so pulled to the present. It is not because life is so
happy or that death is so dark. It is because it is only in the present
that I can fully experience the Presence who made me and loves me.
“Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from you Presence?
If I ascend into heaven, You are there; If I make my bed in hell, behold, You
are there.” Psalml39:7,8 It is His Presence that makes my present
worth staying in, when it is in heaven or hell.
So, now is the salty gulf breeze on my face. It is the smell of popcorn
at the theater. It is reading a bedtime story. It is the strain of my last sit
up (I don’t like sit-ups.). Now is a whispered prayer for patience. It is
studying the face of a loved one in peaceful slumber. It is playing catch. It is
making sandwiches. Now is hearing “There is someone else.” It is
receiving the unwanted diagnosis. Now is not always fair, but it is all
we have. My desire to live more fully now can be compared to the
persistence of the Canaanite woman who begged Jesus for her daughter’s healing
and He rewarded her and praised her faith.
Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow is not ours. There is only One who is
Omni-Present and not bound by time. He is the one who encourages us to live
in His Presence. Don’t wait for death to stare you in the face before you
embrace your present.
Try some of
these ideas that may help you live more fully in your present:
1. Make a decision to live more fully in the moment.
2. Ask God to help you to live more fully in His Presence.
3. Cultivate mindfulness, that is, awareness of your thoughts and
experiences.
4. Be sensitive to the power of past regrets or fears of the future. If given
free reign, they hijack you from your present.
5. Take time to be still. Turn off the TV, the computer, your music and just
be.
6. Make a list of the moments that pull you into the present and create more
of them.
7. Make a list of activities that cause you to drift into an unconscious mind
set.
8. Use your five senses to bring you back into the moment.
9. Be patient. It takes time to live more consciously. You can’t rush this. It
will come.
10. Adopt a “beginner’s mind” like that of a child, who is fully aware that
there is more one does not know than what one does know.
11. Avoid judging yourself or others. You are who you are. Lovingly accept who
you are now.
12. Trust your instinct. If your gut tells you something, pay attention to
it. Ask God for guidance and seek counsel from someone you trust.
13. Don’t put off to tomorrow what you can do today. For example, “I’ll be
healthy after the holidays so I can enjoy them.” Tomorrow is not guaranteed.
Enjoy health today and trust that your commitment to His Presence will
provide you with greater satisfaction than Christmas dinner.
14. Simplify your life and get into the habit of saying “no” so that your
present does not get consumed by busyness.
15. Surround yourself with the beauty of nature. It is God’s reminder of
the gift of His Presence.
16. Play with a child. You will laugh more in their presence, and
they will teach you to live in your present more joyfully, for “such is
the kingdom of heaven” Matthew 19:14.
Yours in Christ, Roma Palcan
Contact Information:
(727) 595-2119
All calls are kept confidential
